It seems Christians in general are the favored archetypes for hypocrisy. (These are just examples, so don't get too carried away.) Am I a hypocrite if I seek to serve the poor but oppose universal healthcare? Am I a hypocrite if I oppose same sex marriage, yet I'm divorced? What if I oppose abortion but approve of capital punishment?

I'm not here to discuss various societal issues and whatnot. My contention here is the rationale and application of the term 'hypocrite' is flawed. Furthermore, it is not a sufficient excuse for rejecting the Gospel of salvation. Would it be sufficient to say that the doctrine of love as preached by Jesus is not the prevalent mindset practiced by contemporary Christians? (That ball got dropped long ago.) Also, that Christians consistently fail to uphold the standards to which they are commanded? Ok. We're on the same page, then.

While I was in high school, I publicly committed to abstinence, complete with the mocking of my peers. I went off to a Christian college with great expectations and graduated with an ambition to serve "the least of these." My resolve wore down rather soon. I gradually made concessions and compromises, ultimately losing my virginity at the ripe old age of 23. Oops. Am I supposed to type that? See, I have always been a firm believer in the biblical view of sex: sex is a beautiful, glorious gift from God, useful for procreation and pleasure, and only permissible within the marriage of a man and a woman.

Hypocrite. I fully expect my now five-year-old daughter to blast me when I remind her of biblical standards during her adolescence and however far beyond. Still, even those who don't label me consider my moral choices suspect. Recently, I was shooting pool with some friends who were trying to decide whether or not we would go to a gentleman's club. I refused. What they had once considered absolute was now up for debate. As my friends, they would never say, "You're tainted now, bro. What's the big deal?" Even so, their approach to my convictions, which hadn't changed, demonstrated their perspective, which had.

The second effect of my failure was that I became afraid of judgment and therefore withdrew from Christian service. I judged myself far more harshly than anyone else did. Now, I may have permanently damaged what some call my "Christian witness." My choices may provide ammo to those who decry the teaching of abstinence. I know my choices shook the faith of a few, and changed the path of my ministry. (I intended to finish seminary and become a pastor—go figure.) But does that change the truth of the Gospel? No. Should that stop me from communicating in love, patience, and compassion, the hope I have in Christ? No.

Hypocrisy wields this great power to create divisions within our society and especially within our spirits. Hypocrisy is its own entity. So, I'm calling him out. "Hypocrisy" has meant that you say one thing and do another. Like when I tell my daughter not to sit on the arm of the couch—as I'm sitting on the opposite arm. "Do as I say and not as I do" kind of thing. The modern application of this misconception is when an individual's behavior is in conflict with his or her set of beliefs, or worldview.

If you possess a worldview based on absolute standards of right and wrong, and you sin, you're automatically a hypocrite. Since all have sinned, all Christians are hypocrites. Conversely, if you possess a worldview that is not predisposed to absolute right and wrong, you can never be a hypocrite. This understanding leads people to wrongly think Jesus' doctrine of love and conservative opposition to same-sex marriage are inconsistent. For marriage is based on love, is it not? How can one preach love, yet restrict the right of one individual to love another? (Again, an example, albeit a feisty one.)

This application of hypocrisy makes two faulty assumptions: (1) Behavior/choices are influenced by beliefs; (2) When they are misaligned, the tangible takes precedence over the intangible. That is to say, behavior influences belief. Since Christians cannot keep it in their pants, nor can they stay married, who are they to determine who can marry whom? Effectively, the sinfulness of Christians has rendered the Bible and its precepts obsolete. Even Christians have this in their mind. I've heard some say, "Yeah, I believe in the Bible, but that doesn't mean all the other religions are wrong."

I would go so far as to say belief and behavior are two separate categories of choice. You choose your belief. You choose your behavior. Should belief influence your behavior? Absolutely—especially Christians. But, to lump the two such that a choice can nullify the truth of a belief is philosophically unsound. It is an ad hominem fallacy to attempt to invalidate an individual's position simply because he or she may be a hypocrite. A person's failure to uphold biblical standards is not sufficient grounds for the abandonment of those standards.

So, how can we define and apply "hypocrisy" effectively and fairly? I shall try. If I believe Jesus commanded me to serve the least of these, yet I tell my daughter to avoid the poor—that is hypocrisy. If I believe Jesus is who he says He is ("The way, the truth, and the light"), yet claim other religions offer a possible way to salvation—then that is hypocrisy. It is not hypocrisy for Mr. Al Gore to leave all the lights on in his home incessantly . . . unless he truly believes it causes harm to the environment, and then he suggests to me that it is okay if I leave all the lights on in my home.

As for those of us who hold to absolute moral standards—if we believe the Bible determines sex to take place only between a married man and woman, and then advise those around us "what happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom"—that is hypocrisy. If we are transparent, holding to our beliefs, our truths, yet acknowledging our failures, there is nothing hidden. There is no two-face, no double standard, and no hypocrisy. Transparency is the key to breaking down the walls that the accepted application of hypocrisy creates. So, let me ask you this: am I a hypocrite?

Bryce Thompson is a single dad, writing and residing in Connecticut's "Quiet Corner."